


thoughts

by cherry_umbra



Category: Danger Days: The True Lives of the Fabulous Killjoys - My Chemical Romance (Album)
Genre: Angst, Gen, Hurt No Comfort, a handful of swears, alternative title: oops! all projection!, aside from the mentioned fibromyalgia, sorry party, the others are only mentioned - Freeform, this is all projection
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-18
Updated: 2020-06-18
Packaged: 2021-03-03 19:28:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 529
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24790858
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cherry_umbra/pseuds/cherry_umbra
Summary: They were alone, for once.
Comments: 4
Kudos: 11





	thoughts

**Author's Note:**

> more Party angst?? from me?? who would've guessed.

They were alone.

It didn’t happen often, almost never, really. It was a rule in their group to never go somewhere or stay at the diner alone. But one of the best markets was around this week and Ghoul and Jet needed the extra hand, so it only took a bit of convincing that, no, they wouldn’t burn down the diner or go galavanting in the few hours the others would be gone.

Party didn’t know what to do, really, since they didn’t think Kobra would actually agree to leaving them alone. It wasn’t a good idea at all, but… they needed the time to think. 

So here they were, on their back, staring at the ceiling like it would give them the answers. They were warm, but they couldn’t be bothered to move and kick off the sheet or take their jacket off. 

Party wanted to cry. But as soon as the tears came, they would stop, and they could feel each individual drop as it slid down their face. They wanted to feel something,  _ anything _ , but everything just seemed so dull and boring. Everything  _ hurt _ , from the… whatever it was that they were born with that made their bones ache and skin hurt, to their brain. Was it possible for someone’s brain to hurt just from being sad? At this point, they didn’t know nor care. 

Witch, they wanted their brother. Or Jet or Ghoul or  _ anyone _ , really. Wanted someone to kick the door open, give them a cup of hot chocolate (one of the very very few things they missed from the City), wrap them up in blankets and hold them until it felt less like they were fading away.

Want, want, want.

It was ironic, really. They were always taking care of the others, telling them that they couldn’t help other people without helping themselves first. Making sure their crew was as happy and safe in this hellscape as they could. But if someone wanted to help them, Party backed away and said they could do it themself. To the point that they felt that they  _ forgot _ how to ask for help. Felt the need to take everyone’s problems on before facing their own demons swept under the rug. Party knew they would rip apart the sky for their crew, knew they would do the same for them, but the words died in their throat any time they tried asking for comfort back. 

And they knew Kobra could see right through the little facade of a confident revolution leader. Knew that he could read them like a book. But he couldn’t do anything when they locked him out and they felt like  _ shit _ for doing that. The Zones needed someone to look up to, and if it had to be them ~~and their crew~~ , then so be it. 

Party blinked away a stray tear, and slapped around on the floor until their hand hit the ancient cassette player, brought it closer and popped the somehow still working earbuds in, turning it up. Not too loud, in case anything happened. They took a deep breath and closed their eyes.

They would talk to the others. Later.

**Author's Note:**

> (john mulaney voice) and then they didn't.
> 
> come scream at me on tumblr @chrry-pnch
> 
> this story came to me last night like a prophet receiving word from an angry god
> 
> comments n kudos are appreciated!


End file.
